A letter to the one I used to love

     My goodness, how things have changed. I remember how close we used to be..there wasn't a day that passed by without you. Ever since I can remember, you have been there for me..to pick me up when I was down, to comfort me when I needed warmth. Just the thought of you would bring a sparkle in my eye. Even now, that I don't have you; you still make my heart skip a beat.
 
   What happened to us? They said you weren't good for me. But I never believed such a hurtful lie. But then, I realized how I needed you more and more; I needed you more constantly. A day without you was a day I didn't want to live. But, you started making me feel so anxious. There were nights I couldn't sleep. You were starting to become a vicious cycle, an addiction. Everyone was right about you. As much as I hated the idea, I had to let you go. I'm sorry.

   As much as it broke my heart, I let you go, and tried to live my life without you. It was a very difficult time for me, I felt as if I couldn't go on without you. But sooner than later, I started to feel the warmth of the rays of the sun. The grey clouds had dissipated and I was able to feel that fuzzy feeling of happiness with out me. I had gotten over you.

  But my wonderful memories of you were still comforting. How could I live my life without you? How could I had been so crass in letting you go?  Maybe I was being so foolish? Maybe I could bring you back into my life. At least just once more. And I did, one beautiful cool and crisp February morning, I met you again. Happier than ever before, I was. Such a joyful event..on a slow Tuesday.

 Oh, but vengeance was sweet for you, wasn't it? My pulse was racing; my heart, pounding; and I began to feel vertiginous. Oh no! What have I done?! After a pristine, short period without you! I ruined it! I ruined everything! You truly broke my heart! How can I bring you back into my life, if you're just going to make me feel miserable?! I guess I must make amends with the fact that it is completely over between us. Never again will I get to enjoy a hot, bitter, and chocolaty coconut milk latte; not here, not anywhere in the world. Never will I ever get to enjoy my routinely morning espresso from my Italian stove top espresso maker.
 Oh well.
   I have reluctantly changed my routine to exploring the world of herbal tea. But I must say, I have found some favorites that have already began to replace you. But I will always revere the sublime memories I have of enjoying you. Maybe someday, we can reconcile and began a healthy relationship. But for now, I will just have my memories and the sensual aromas of you everywhere.

Börek, Veganized

           Börek, if you don't know what it is, it is a  type of  flaky, oily, scrumptious phyllo pastry, originating from Anatolia. With different variations, spreading all throughout Eastern Europe, Western Asia, and the Balkans. The one I'm referring to is the Bulgarian variety, which is meat filled.
  When I visited Bulgaria, there were many types of delicious phyllo pastries; banitsa, tikvenik, baklava, strudel, and börek (which I couldn't try). May I add, Bulgarian cuisine carries one of the best, most delicious and fresh foods I have ever tasted! (It beats Mexican food in my book!)

  Coming back home, after my visit, I went straight into my kitchen to start recreation some of those tasty Bulgarian dishes!(Well, first I took a nap...and unpacked..). Most were very easy to recreate, especially with the help of my Bulgarian husband. But, I knew that börek was going to be quite a challenge, or so I thought!
   
   Bulgarian börek contains meat, as I mentioned above. The intsy tinsy problem is that, I don't eat meat. So, I put on my thinking cap and off I went to the nearest Trader Joe's.  I wanted to create a veggie filled pastry, with the flavor and mouth feel of its meat filled counterpart.

  And, my oh my did I ever execute this to a "T"!  Flaky, crispy, and oily crust, with a juicy and flavorful filling!! I don't think my husband missed the meat, because I make this more often than not! We had very happy tummies and an empty casserole in no time!!

  What I added: one package of soy meat crumbles, one package of chopped mushrooms, grated carrots and zucchini, finely chopped onion and garlic. Roasted sweet red peppers, chopped (you can add those raw, if you'd like). Fresh chopped parsley, dill (only because it's my favorite herb), a bit of tomato paste and a tablespoon of red wine( you can opt out on the wine, if you'd like). You will also need a package of phyllo dough and sunflower oil, or olive oil.